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being a new mom AND a functioning human being

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being a new mom AND a functioning human being: August 2008

Monday, August 04, 2008

Can't Complain


Well, what's new around here is nothing. Nothing new, but everything just the same every day and every week. Which is okay, sometimes, sometimes boring, but mostly just good because one knows what to expect. However, when things are status quo, you can do two things: 1) be thankful about how things are good, no one is sick or dying, life is alright, or....2) complain. I choose to complain.

Okay, okay, as you probably know I hate to be thought of as a complainer, but if you looked into my mind, way back there somewhere I'm never fully satisfied. Is anyone? Well, I take that back, I was a therapist. A lot of people are satisfied, but they like to complain anyway. It's hard to say it out loud, I feel like Michelle Obama saying "for the first time in my life I'm proud of my county!" I don't mean I'm complaining about having such a great life...I just mean that I'm wondering, where are we going with all of this? Is it going to be good?

Ben's a carpenter, a heavy highway carpenter, which means most of his life is spent outside, in the sun, working his butt off maybe on a road or highway or most usually building a bridge somewhere. He sets up forms, into which concrete is poured, and then takes them down again. And although he never complains, I can tell that there are times that he too is thinking, hmm, am I really happy?

This is where it comes in handy to have a child. Excepting the times where Helena is sad, she is always, always happy. And she is only sad when she 1) is hurt, 2) is hungry or thirsty, 3) is sleepy, or 4) when she doesn't get something she wants. And I don't mean like a promotion, the fourth thing is usually another popsicle, or perhaps drawing on the couch with a permanent marker or something. So generally, she's happy all the time, which makes it a LOT easier to be happy ourselves. Or when we're not, we just look at Helena, who's saying, "Okay, Daddy, I be WIGHT BACK in WUN MINIT." And then going to get her fairy wings on to eat dinner in.

Once I joked with my neighbor, who has a 2- and a 5-year-old, "how come they're never stressed?!" She said "because we do all the work and they get to have all the fun!" And she's right, that's how it should be as a kid! But it did remind me to try to have a little more fun. I have a friend who's biking across the US right now, and when I read her postings she's always talking about this sunrise, or a great piece of pie, or some great adventure, and I think, we also need to hold on to that freedom. Maybe I can't bike the US right now, but I can take a little look at my life and fit some fun in. Maybe if I do, I won't have time to complain. :)