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being a new mom AND a functioning human being

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being a new mom AND a functioning human being: February 2009

Saturday, February 21, 2009

getting closer to that time again


Hello again, friends.
In case I haven't told you before, I love the age of 2. It's so much fun, they're so amazing and getting more and more independent every day. Yes, there are free will battles and lots of making excuses, asking why, etc., but it's also a really fun time, with imagination and excitement all around. Today Helena sat on the potty for about 20 minutes trying to poop (yes, it's really the little things in life...) and I sat with her, and we pretended to exchange teeth. Something like, "Okay, I'm putting your teeth back in. Oh NO!! Your teeth are too big for your MOUTH!!!" And that's how we pass the time, around here.

Anyway, it's also a problematic age, 2 is. Yes, for all the reasons above, but that's small potatoes compared to the real problem with age 2. Because as adorable and exciting as 2 is, it's the age where your hormones begin to lie to you. They tell you, "hey, this isn't that bad! Isn't she cute??! Isn't she funny??! Maybe..." (and this is the kicker) "maybe we do want to do this again after all!"

Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo! Screams your mind (what's left of it). But it's too late. You're pregnant again. And again, it begins.

That said, We're almost back to that baby stage. I'm due in 8 weeks, and this time it really does seem like we can do it again, like it won't be so bad. We keep saying the things that only people with one child say, like "Maybe this time will be better because we'll know what we're doing!" I keep half expecting that foreboding "dun-dun-DUUUUUN!" that you hear in mystery movies to play over our heads. But things haven't been that bad, really. This pregnancy I only throw up once a week instead of once per half-hour. Helena is old enough to hand me a tissue. "Maybe we can do this again," I think.

Sometimes Helena grabs my belly and says "Little sister! Come outta there!" and I think, okay, it's really why all people do this over and over. When she grabs my boobs, in public, and says "MOMMY, THE BABY SISTER'S IN THERE??!" Okay, it's not all glamorous, but it really is touching. And this week, when she was "helping" us paint her new "big girl bedroom" furniture, all grown up, and I glimpsed her 20 years down the road as an adult, I think okay, it won't be that bad.

Someday soon, that is, I'll have another 2-year old.